Patience and Prayer

I’ve been feeling that I needed to post a blog soon. However, I really couldn’t think of a topic to blog about. Today, a table I purchased for my dining room came in the mail and I put it together. My table is very lovely and I was talking to my grandmother about the fact. In the midst of talking to her, I had to stop and thank God. I had to think about where I was last year and where I am today.

 Last year around this time I had just graduated from my graduate program, gotten a new job, purchased a new car, and moved into a new unfurnished apartment yet I was very depressed. I was depressed because I was in debt to survive. I needed to work, I needed to get there, and I needed a place to stay. Starting with $0 dollars only allows you get in debt to take care of all of those things. It was a very sad time. My boyfriend had moved to my city to be with me and he didn’t have a job to start off so it was a very rough patch. Our apartment was empty we only had an air mattress that his aunt had given us, a tv, and a tv stand. Eating was even a challenge. Well I found a couch for $20 bucks and we added that.  Later in the month an awesome co-worker of mine gave us a futon to add to our empty home. It was very depressing. I am not ashamed to say. Yes I went through a period of depression.

However, today I am proud to say that I have moved on. God has blessed us with a bigger apartment, a full living room, two bedrooms both furnished, and today I completed my Dining area. God is so good and he works on his time. It had nothing to do with me being depressed but the fact that he had a plan in store for me. Some may say. Hey Dreka, those are material things. I agree, but I also look at them as physical things. Sometimes people need to see things to believe it. You can’t measure or began to see my happiness at this point in my life, you can’t measure the fact that I feel better with myself, you can’t measure the fact that my faith is stronger than it was last year, you can’t measure the joy I feel to say that I am debt free.  I will be lying to you if I said I didn’t have my bad days because I swear I do. But I get out of that funk and live my life day to day. There is no sense in worrying about tomorrow when tomorrow’s not even promised. 

Sincereheart,

SHHH!!!!!

Warning: This was too long to be a facebook post! Viewer discretion advised.

People can be so judgmental. Call me a hypocrite for writing this blog. I honestly don’t care. However, I watch a lot of videos on social media and people always have [insert curse word] to say. It doesn’t matter if the person(s) in the videos are being positive or not. There are going to be 899,999,999 comments and 899,999,990 are going to be negative.  “She wrong for this. Call child protection services. That baby hair .2 centimeters to short” “Oh, my God, he should be arrested that dog breathing to hard. It’s dehydrated.” Shut the [insert curse word] up! You don’t know what is going on with these folks. It just kills me that people are so quick to give a verdict from 10-15 second clips on facebook. I am so happy that our constitution exists and jurors are screened. Don’t get me wrong, I know that some slip through the cracks. For the most part I trust that we are not going to get some of these commenters on social media. I’m just saying. One wrong move ruins your name when it comes to social media. “Wow, I almost saw her nipple. May she be called a THOT forever!” Y’all runs the hell out!

Oh and don’t let somebody’s child know the words to a song. They are horrible mothers and fathers. They need their children to be taken away. Really people!! Why take those kids away and no one is taking them in? Heaven forbid they know a gospel song “They should be a shame of themselves. That child is not old enough to understand religion! They are forcing God on that child. Let’s take their children away and sentence them to life.” People please calm down. Sometimes it’s best not to say anything. Everything doesn’t have to have a comment. It’s okay to “like” the post and move on. When I say “like” the post I’m just saying recognize that you saw it. At the end of the day your opinion really doesn’t matter because the video is recorded which means that the event itself is in the past.

I’m Irritated but I swear it’s with the Sincerest Heart 

My Journey: Day 2

So let’s talk about Day 2 of this journey. I am feeling good. I am feeling motivated and I feel that I can do this. Yesterday, I cooked a nice meal and watched my carb and sugar intake. I did not eat out today at work, instead I ate leftovers from the day before. However, my leftovers tasted better for lunch than it did last night for dinner. I am struggling with eating breakfast. Today I did manage to take a granola bar to work. Some challenges that I foresee in the future is sweets. I want to eat sweets! I know that if I just get a taste for something sweet I am going to go bunkers and become the cookie monster.

Another challenge I foresee…. THE BF. He hasn’t said anything yet but I can tell by the look on his face and the fact that he hasn’t been to the kitchen in seconds for the last two days that he is not feeling this health kick. He wants better for me and understands the health part of my journey but I don’t think he thought about the fact that he would be dragged along too. But that’s okay. I know how to mix it up and sometimes do half and half.

That’s the health part of me. The social part of me is still pretty steady.  I just don’t know what to do about it this point. Let’s revisit this later.

With the Sincerest Heart

My Journey

            So starting Monday, I will be going on a journey. This journey is about me and me only. Somewhere along the way I lost myself. I think that it may have been in college when I was so focused on school and my grades. Although, I did well, I obsessed about it all the time and my social life suffered tremendously. My senior year of undergrad is when I realize that I was missing out on life. However, then there was graduate school. During graduate school, I had a life but it was centered on grad school. All my hang out friends were in my program and that is what we talked about all the time. However, I’ve just completed my first year being a full time employee. This has been hard. All my friends have moved away from the city I live in. My childhood friends are scattered across the globe. My family lives 2.5 hours away from me.  I have a boyfriend but he has his life and his own social circle.  I am bored out of my mind. I find myself getting depressed and feeling exhausted all the time. I sit at home all day and think about my shortcomings and where my life can deserve some improvements. So instead of pouting about my need for improvements, I am going to do something about it. So starting Monday, I am going on a journey. On this journey I plan to make changes for my physical health, my spirituality, my mental health and overall wellness. I can’t change the fact that my friends are miles away but I can get out more and meet new people. So as I go on this journey I wish myself the best. Hey, maybe I’ll let you in on the way.

With the Sincerest Heart,

Sincereheart